by Chris McMorrow Everyone is aware of the changes wrought upon our social landscape by the advent the Internet. We've got more people farther apart forming larger communities, but what about the effect on the individual behind the glowing screen?  Can the words we type ever constitute a true interpersonal bond between two people? Online lovers say yes, a large number of psychologists, scholars and social scientists say no. A study conducted by the Stanford Institute for the Quantitative Study of Society in November 2005 sampled 4,113 adults in 2,689 households and found that more time on the Internet leads to isolation and depression. According to the study, people also spend more hours on the Internet the longer they have been using it.
Now consider the anxious and awkward of society whose lives have been resurrected by e-mail, ICQ, myspace.com and other multi-user domains. Before the advent of CMC or computer-mediated communication, they were forced to make a friend in-person -- no small task for someone who feels disabled by shyness. Restricted and stigmatized by their inability to relate to people in the same room, in a virtual environment they can have a life and even thrive. The busy. The lazy. The socially graceless. Those who participate in cyberspace affairs are quick to laud the reversal of traditional mating rituals in which people can get to know another’s mind first, and then their measurements. Can we now can approach someone online like we pretend to do in person. "Did you get a load of her innermost thoughts and anxieties? So hot." I just don't see it. Devotees of on-line dating sites insist that an exchange of emotion takes place every time two people chat, argue, commiserate, complain, flirt, brainstorm, or gossip on the net. Indeed they beseech the user to exercise caution when wielding such powerful emotional expressions as emoticons, capitals, varying sizes of paragraphs, insertions of quoted text and the potentially devastating message response delay. One steamy online lover from Hugkiss.com recommends lighting a scented candle, lowering the lights, slipping into a silky outfit and simply letting your mind expand to include your absent partner… Communicating via computer seems to create barriers that hinder the formation of interpersonal bonds. Relationship development depends, in part, on the impressions we make about our partner. Without the nonverbal cues of touch, taste, sight, hearing and body language, these impressions take a lot longer to form. A recent study in American Psychologist that examined the effect of the Internet on 169 people during their first two years and showed that greater use is linked to declines in social involvement and increases in depression and loneliness. So why are so many people choosing the cold pricklies? It could already be beyond our control. Social scientists now view our globally connected community as continually altering its definition of acceptable social behavior. Soon it may be a moot point that more of us don't maintain traditional non-virtual relationships. We could be witnessing a progressive phasing out of the individual altogether. Are we forging a new, collective soul or embracing the Borg?
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