Blue in Berlin - ProvokatoR magazine

Blue in Berlin

on 15-04-2007 11:07

Published in : , Wanderlust

www.ol-cartoon.de/

by Calvin Keogh

You’re probably reading this in the comfort of an artificially heated environment. If lucky enough, your idea of torture might be to remain there with the power switched off. Imagine the creeping cold, the chattering dentures and spare a thought for the neighbors of Russia, annually threatened with the prospect unless they pay up.

Dependent for a fifth of their oil and a quarter of natural gas, there’s plenty of reason for Europeans to feel a shiver down the spine too. Angela Merkel lost some sleep last month fretting over energy supplies to her high-ceilinged chancellory in the heart of Berlin. Berliners themselves, though, are more accustomed to heat deprivation

It’s an astonishing fact that in the ultra-modern capital of the world’s third largest economy, famed for efficiency and environmental sensitivity, you’ll still find the average citizen huddled by a charcoal burner. East or west, come the onset of winter, they'll be hoarding combustibles and sitting in for the delivery of tons of black coal.

Kreuzberg

It’ll all be kept in the dankest of cellars. Plastic bags, heavy gloves and tongs are recommended and a good deal of patience required. To avoid suffocation, make sure the valve is open and remember to clear out the ashes. You’ll avoid hypothermia if you don’t wander too far, but can look forward to a chilly morning before the daily ritual of rekindling.

How to break the cycle? Hike it to ‘Kotti’, right at the heart of Kreuzberg. It’s always hot in the ghetto, although you’re unlikely to catch the heat of burning vehicles until the traditional May Day riots. Instead, work up some emissions-free kenetic energy by sprinting to the elevated U-Bahn for the ‘70s concrete block view, a favorite for German hip hop videos.

Pinpoint the bunker and find a radiator at the library. Right across the street stands the Kreuzberg Museum where most days you’ll find Sandra from NYC who’ll offer a steaming mug of tea and tell you stories of Berlin. Don’t miss the toytown card models with viewfinders attached so you can zoom through the windows and catch the friendly neighbors.

German staple: Doner Kebab

Nip back across the street and stoke up some calories at Hasir’s. At his humble take-away way back in ’71, fast food impressario Mehmet Aygun knocked out all the competition by inventing the doner kebab. Germans chew 300 metric tons of the stuff every day. Join in and fill up retro style with an all-original they-don’t-make-‘em-like-they-used-to.

Join the lads for a Turkish coffee and puff on a hookah in one of the many neighborhood cafes. Meet more of the locals at the sawdust-floored Kneipen or look out for Bob and His Imperial Majesty Haile Selassie in the window at Harar rastabar. You can’t miss Babylon, Berlin’s English movie theater, where you can try to resist putting your feet up.

Back outside, you’ll see the plate glass walls of Möbel Olfe, getting the energy even before entering this ultimate cool anti-cool neighborly all-comers sparely stylish dive. Have a Polish beer and ask your new friends for Paloma Bar. At the signless retro lounge you can expect non-stop vinyl hits, lots of smiles and plenty of body heat.

Paloma Bar - Berlin

It could be dawn when you emerge to watch the fresh fruit and vegetables being piled up on the market stalls outside. It’s been a winter of double digits, especially kind to street traders. Wander over and put together a picnic breakfast. Strike up a conversation. Maybe global warming isn’t such a bad thing after all? For now, they might just agree.